Post by Derpy on Jun 18, 2012 21:10:46 GMT -5
The image of Derpy as a bartender is a comical one. But she just wants to help out her adopted daughter!
Presented with glorious OOC chatter!
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In a page-pose to you, Sky_Blue hugs mommy.
You page-pose, "Derpy also hug. Come home with?" to Sky_Blue
Sky_Blue pages, "Yes! " to you.
Sky_Blue pages, "Want come meadery? " to you.
S and S Meadery(#882RJ)
You stand now inside the warm and welcoming customer service area of S&S Meadery. The room is decorated in soft earth tones; the oak walls and support beams, while lacking any kind of paint, are sanded to a smooth, pleasing texture. The same can be said for the long counter that stretches almost the length of the wall opposite the front door, behind which stand four bottle racks spaced evenly. The outer two racks have between them a pair of square windows, with simple diamond cut panes in them. Between the middle racks, positioned in the exact center of the long counter, are a pair of framed pictures. One of the owner, Sky Blue, and the other of Salsa Verde, her Very Special Somepony and the delight of her heart.
[ Obvious Exits: <O>ut to the Market ]
[ Players: Sky_Blue(#398PBC)
Dusty has arrived.
Dusty(#839PBC) [Female Unicorn]
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You see before you a short, young unicorn, with a white coat and grey mane. Her mane and tail are about medium length, and messy. Her coat and mane however, has dust all over it, creating a sort of mottled appearance. She's a sculptor who lives in ponyville. tinyurl.com/75b3xxc
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<OOC> Dusty found the way! :3
Dusty has just looked at you!
<OOC> Sky_Blue hoofs Dusty!
<OOC> Dusty is hoofed!
<OOC> You say, "Who go first?"
<OOC> Dusty rolls die
<OOC> Dusty points to sky.
<OOC> Sky_Blue is OOC for a bit! Making maps
<OOC> Sky_Blue but lovehugs!
<OOC> Dusty says, "okay! Derpy, you then :3"
Derpy is standing behind the the counter, smiling genially and apparently doing nothing except possibly--possibly--thinking. Her wings are folded neatly at her sides and she has a neat little cap on.
Dusty walks in, apparently a little lost. She may be a ponyville resident, but she doesnt get out much, till recently, because her friend Beryl decided to trade her stones for social interaction. So therefore Dusty came here, not knowing exactly what the place was. Noting the pony behind the counter, she smiled. "Hello?" She said, tentatively.
Derpy smiles back, stepping forward with tiny steps. "Helllo!" she says in a disorientingly ill-formed high-pitched voice. "Welcome to Meadry! How can help?!" The gray bartender's wings rise in apparent joy.
Dusty blinks a bit at the strange grey bartender. "I dunno, what is done here? It smells like old cider and... something else..."
Derpy turns up half her smile while the other half gets rather serious. She lowers her wings most of the way. "Is honey," she confised. "Alcohol? Is treasure found in bee sauce."
PUB >> Marbletos, the Filemaker says, "You also told Marble ALL your secrets!"
<OOC> Dusty says, "hi salsa"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Of the helloness."
<OOC> Dusty says, "...wat"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Is thereuponings of the RPness. Of the joinings of the okaynesses?"
<OOC> You say, "Is of, from, beyond, before, below, around, within, and above the okaynesses!!!"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Of the hoorayings!"
## Salsa_Verde changes her status to IC (In Character).
Dusty shrugs, having no experince in the field. She didnt drink to create art, that's what the brownies are for! Wait. Anyways, the sculptor approaches the bar. "Well, I mean, I didnt know that there was a meadery here..."
Derpy looks up at the ceiling and frowns. She looks back to the customer. "Is okay. Me not either!!" She grins and leaps gracelessly over the counter, stumbling on the way. "Want to buy meads??"
Salsa Verde, sauce mare. A very distinct and hard to forget individual. The green mare is exiting the kitchen with a dozen eggs levitated from her horn, her beadyeyes studying the carton. One could perhaps ask her what she is doing. Especially as she carefully sets the cartoon down on the ground and then pounding her face on it to muck the eggs.
Skippy has arrived.
Derpy looks over queerly at Salsa, while the skiuttish customer flees from overenthusiastic Derpy. "Salllsa? Why egg?"
<OOC> Skippy says, "I think somepony likes me. ^_^"
<OOC> You say, "Hello Skippish."
( Salsa peers up from the eggs she smashed, yolk dribbling down from her face. She is careful to keep it dribbling on the carton. "Of the shieldings. The protectiveness of the whichings thereuponness from the villings of Ponynesses..." She peers around suspiciously, then leans in closely to Derpy, albumen seeping. "... from... the... gnomeses." )
Derpy blinks several times at Salsa. Each time, there's a little chime, and her eyes are in a different position when she opens them. She shakes her head to clear it. "Egg? Is shield for bird." She lifts a hoof and touches Salsa's nose gently, getting it eggy. "But gnoooomes?" She derps, and then says clearly: "Not lay eggs!"
Salsa throws a crazy hoof into the air, splatting more egg. "Of the fearings! There is a fearnessnessings of the eggses of the gnomeses." Salsa gets behind the counter and starts rummaging. "Do the stopness. Do the stopness! The stopness!" Rummage, rummafge. "OF THE BRUSHES OF PAINTINGS UPON THE WHERENESSES?!"
<OOC> Skippy says, "Trying to understand what's going on here XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Derpy is, I think, tending bar... Salsa is... Salsa. She's crazy, don't try to understand her. XD She's smashed some eggs and is now searching for a paintbrush."
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "I'm I'm trying to convince Sky to POSE ALREADY. XD"
Skippy steps in through the front door, blinking at the rambling unicorn as he passes by, sitting himself by the bar, glancing over at the grey pegasus. "Drunken stupor?"
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "Ah'm workin', dammit. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Work and pose! I do it all the time!"
<OOC> Skippy says, "I'm working too."
<OOC> Skippy says, "I have a lot to do this week : /"
Derpy glaces over at the newcomer. She tries to smile, but finds it hard with Salsa overacting and egg whites dripping from her face. "No. If drunken, then ~cannot~ guess!" She steps around the bar, letting Salsa take her place. She's about to ask the customer what she can do for him when Salsa starts raving and she turns back, snapping at her: "Stopness of WHAT? FEARNESS OF WHOOOM!!"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "It is hard to figure why the two don't like each other. XD"
<OOC> You say, "Is true."
<OOC> You say, "Maybe Derpy? Half gnome."
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "DERPYMOMMYGNOME?! D:"
<OOC> Skippy says, "We're all ponies here"
<OOC> Derpy only joke.
<OOC> You say, "...maybe."
<OOC> Salsa_Verde beadyeyes.
<OOC> Derpy derpyeyes.
<OOC> Skippy says, "Are you expecting me to pose next?"
<OOC> Derpy not expect. Only hope.
"Stop the gnomeses. There is a mustings of stopness of gnomeses." Salsa is not finding the paintbrush, and this seems to be getting her upset. Soon she slams a drawer shut, then seems to take notice of the newcomer. BEadyeyes. "Og the helloness."
Derpy shoots a sharp glance back to Salsa. "Nevver gnome," she enunciates. Her ears flick. She then turns back to Skippy and places her feet neatly in place. "Can help?"
"Uh, hello? Are you okay? Skippy scratches his head, looking back at Derpy. "Ah, yup. I was lookin' to get a drink, a mug of that cider?" He drops the bits on the bar. "What's a g-gnome?"
( Salsa hears that question and jumps right up on the bar and leans in close to fix Skippy with her eyes, searching him. Piercing his soul with her eyes. "You are not of the gnomeses." She doesn't move. Is he a spy? )
IS he a SPY??! Derpy doesn't care. She leaps in place, her wings flipping out for a second, and then dashes away from Salsa in a panic. Then she speeds into the back and her voice can be heard imploring Sky to fix a cider. She fled the insanity and placed the order in one fluid motion! Is intent? Or purpose?
<OOC> Sky_Blue is so confusedlost. XD
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Salsa is trying to figure out if Skippy, who ordered a drink from Derpy, is a spy for the gnomes."
Skippy frowns and tries tries to push the crazed unicorn off the bar. "You should prolly sleep off whatever your high on."
"Skychiilld! CIIDEERRR! Make it old one." Derpy sounds so funny when she's frazzled.
( "COMIN'!" bellows the voice of a hayseed from further within the meadery, shortly accompanied by a cyan filly with a shock of bright yellow hair bursting out through the double doors to the mead room itself, a bottle of dark cider clutched in her mouth. Trotting over to the counter, she sets it down in front of Skippy with a bright smile, then turns to look at her Very Special- "... why've y'all got eggs on yer face, Salsy?" )
Salsa beadyeyes. Did that pony just try to push her off the bar? And was that an insult? What did this pony say to the crazy sauce mare of Ponyville? Her pupils are constricting rapidly. She hops down, her eyes, fixed dangerously on the customer. "I am of the needings of my whiskness. ... ... ... Of the *mayonn--*" Salsa loses all her focus as her Very Special Somepony arrives. "Of the Skyness!"
Derpy speeds in and whispers into Sky's ear: "Is for gnomelies." She then leeeans over the bar and tugs at Salsa's ear. "Whisk? In draw-er. Other whisk?" She looks behind her. "In pile of junks. Needly for cleeaning!"
"I reckon she must have ate something bad." He continues to stare at the Unicorn, taking a swig of the cider. "Mm, that's pretty good."
Is Skippy.
( "That'll be... ten-eight bits, please!" Sky Blue informs the stallion, before turning her attention back to Salsa, and then to Derpy, looking relatively confused. "Why've y'all got eggs all over yer face, sugarcube?" she repeats, her attention focusing once more upon the crazy saucemare. "They weren't the ones ah was keepin' in the larder, were they?" )
Salsa was about to go get her battle whisk when Sky again stops her to ask why she has egg all over her face. Then she asks where the eggs came from. Her beady eyes look in one direction, then in the other direction, then at Sky Blue. "Of the maybeness."
Derpy focuses in on Salsa. "How ~much~ of maybeness?" She pauses and teeters ominously on straight legs. "~Alllll~ of maybeness?!"
Skippy slides them off the counter for her anyways. "Here ya go." He looks between the unicorn, the pegasus and the filly, taking another swig of cider he looks at the filly. "Hey, ya'll wouldn't happen to need a peanut supplier, would ya?"
Red_Velvet has arrived.
"Ah was savin' those fer some bakin', sweetie!" Sky Blue informs her beloved with a sigh and a mildly frustrated expression, before shaking her head. "It doesn't matter; ah'll pick up some more later." When the customer speaks up, the earth filly turns her attention to him and replies in an apologetic voice, "Ah'm afraid we don't have a need fer 'em, as far as ah know, sugarcube; we don't use 'em in makin' mead."
<OOC> Sky_Blue hugs RV!
<OOC> Red_Velvet says, "What sort of underhooved business goes on within these walls?! "
<OOC> Red_Velvet smirks.
<OOC> You say, "Is cider sale and gnome banish."
<OOC> Red_Velvet says, "Both very important points of trade and safety!"
<OOC> Red_Velvet says, "I do love the decor here as well. "
<OOC> Red_Velvet hugs everypony.
<OOC> Red_Velvet says, "I may join in a round. If that is acceptable?"
<OOC> You say, "Yes surely. But I? Will must go soon."
<OOC> Sky_Blue hugs!
( Salsa beadyeyes. Peanuts. In making peanut butter. A condiment. She makes condiments in her shop. She cleanly leaps over the bar and sits her plot right next to Skippy. "Of the peanutses? For the makings of butternesses of peanutses?" )
Derpy is knocked over and falls stiff on the floor. A few seconds later, she gets up and stands behind the bar, smiling placidly.
Skippy takes another swig and produces a jar of peanut butter, setting it on the counter. "Uh- yup. We make that too. Great stuff. We uppin' our supply this year so if your lookin' fer some wholesale. Uh, we make it. hah!" He finishes off the mug of cider. "Think I can get some more?"
Derpy quietly takest he bottle in her teeth and tilts it sideways, letting the cider flow into the cup. Her ireses fall to the bottom of their sclera, but amazingly she doesn't spill any. She turns and rights herself and plops the bottle down again. Such a good bartender!
Red_Velvet limps into the meadery, glancing around the customer reception area and the purchasing counter. She looks much the worse for wear. Her normally flawless mane is a utter wreck. Her back left leg bandaged with a hint of blood seeping through. Her gait is still and she winces with each step, "Hello Sky darling. I do hope I am not intruding on you and Salsa. I just wanted come come by and check on you both. I was...concerned. How are you doing?"
<OOC> Sky_Blue is getting tired and gets sprung on by Red the Warhero!
<OOC> Red_Velvet hugs, "Oh Darling I wasn't aware you were getting ready for a rest. Don't mind my pose then. "
<OOC> Skippy says, "Woooo! Partaaaay!"
( Salsa beadyeyes as she hears the pony say what he does, echoing unnaturally through her addled brain: 'Uh- yup. We make so if your lookin' if your lookin' fer yup. We make that that too. Great stuff. Hah!' She seems to be listening to this a moment, then leans over to Skippy. "Of the *whatness* of the sayings of the younesses? Of... the... *making* of a sauceness? A SAUCENESS?!" )
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "So... how would y'like yer remains t'be interred, Skippy?"
Derpy shakes Salsa with the gentle feel of someone dislodging a ball from a gutter. "Not is sauce. Is butter!" She grins to Skippy. "Is peeaanut butteeerr." She smiles to Red if she's there, and frowns at seeing her injuries.
<OOC> Salsa_Verde OOCly notes its nothing personal. XD Salsa is... unstable and probably not at all fond of competition.
<OOC> Skippy says, "What is this. Some sort of cupcakes thing going on? "
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "Salsa's clinically insane. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "I won't go as far as CUPCAKES, though. But Salsa's got what has been affectionately dubbed the Battle Whisk. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "You'll be fine, I promise. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde hopes she's not OOCly scaring Skippy. Salsa's actually meant to be funny, not scary. XD
<OOC> You say, "Oh, is funny all right."
Skippy starts drinking more cider as soon as it's poured, flicking an ear, blinking. Looking back at Salsa. "Hnnh? Where ya'll get your peanut? Ours is the best. This one colt waf like, canterlot make better peanut, and I get in his face an like WHAT? Then you know what he do? That pansy go an wet himself! hahahah!" He bangs on the bar and takes another swig. Looks like he's starting to lose it himself.
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Well hey, tit for tat, Skippy scared Marble. "
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Sky doesn't have any vases in her meadery, does she? XD"
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "Of the noness. XD"
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "She's genre savvy. XD"
Red_Velvet smiles and waves Sky's concern away, then she actually looks worried for a moment, it takes a lot to worry Red. "Sky dear, I was in the hospital earlier. But with the help of two clients and another friend I made an escape. We sort of had to crush...77? or was it 78 ponies to get out? I lost count darling. But I felt I needed to come see you and dear Salsa. I was worried for you both. Nothing untoward has happened today?" Red Velvet glances at Salsa and then back to Sky, "Darling...if I might make a request. Don't...don't go anywhere without Salsa, and don't let her go anywhere without you alright? Just...watch over one another if you please?"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Good. A vase in there Salsa might end out taking out half of Sky's customers. "
"A small explosion or two, but nothin' out of the ordin'ry," the hayseed replies to Red Velvet, blinking heavily a couple of times. "Y'know Salsa could take out a dragon if she wanted to. How come we need t'stick together? Has somethin' happened?" All of this goes on with Sky Blue being oblivious to what is no doubt reaching FaceVase territory, behind her.
Derpy lifts a hoof and tries to speak, but can't get a word in. Eventually, she give Sky Blue a kiss on the cheek. "Must go now," she murmurs. "Time for mail."
<OOC> Skippy says, "I'm very confused. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Word of advice: Trying to make sense of the most insane pony in Equestria will just make your head hurt. XD"
Salsa is panting, clearly distressed, clearly getting energized by these words echoing through her randomized clockwork of a brain. 'Colt waf like, canterlot colt waf like, canterlot that pansy go an that pansy go an best. This one colt and I get in waf like, canterlot make where ya'll get your pansy go an wet in his face an do? That pansy go do? That pansy go he do? That pansy get in his face where ya'll get your best.' Salsa could care less about pansies getting all scared. What she does pick up on, however, is this colt saying stuff like 'making the best peanut butter' as her brain soon paraphrases it. "The mentsnesses of the condiyings of the MENTENESS MINENSSES! Evergnomeses of the lovingses! OF THE LOVINGSES!" The insane sauce mare soon stands up, letting out a bloodcurdling, Amazonian war cry of all time! Three bar stools are levitated in the air. "OF THE GNOMESESNESSINGS LOVINGSES OF THE YOUNESS!"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "FaceVase 2.0: Dodgebarstool"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde hopes Skippy isn't OOCly concerned. XD
<OOC> Salsa_Verde doesn't hurt anypony without permission. XD
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Also, Dodgebarstool sounds like a Dwarf Fortress fortress name. XD"
Skippy squenches his face and stands up. "Hay geez lady, what was that guy your boyfrien' or somethin'? I dinni' mean it like that. He was insultin' my business. Damn, calm down!"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde sometimes worries and fusses OOCly. XD
Red_Velvet is about to answer Sky's questions, but it is then that Salsa seems to reach critical mass. Red turns and makes for the end of the bar for cover should things turn ugly....er, uglier. Stating flatly while she goes, "Yes Sky, something has happened, something terrible. I think you and Salsa may be in danger. Regardless of Salsa's capacity for destruction. A truly vicious pony may be actually targeting you both. I fear Sky she is going to try to hurt you if she can." Red slips behind the counter and covers her head with her hooves, definitely not wanting to see what becomes of Skippy.
When Salsa goes into rage mode and screams, levitating three stools, Derpy's hair stands up more spikily than usual and in a panic she skitters out of the building, knocking over a chair as she goes.
Presented with glorious OOC chatter!
------------------------
In a page-pose to you, Sky_Blue hugs mommy.
You page-pose, "Derpy also hug. Come home with?" to Sky_Blue
Sky_Blue pages, "Yes! " to you.
Sky_Blue pages, "Want come meadery? " to you.
S and S Meadery(#882RJ)
You stand now inside the warm and welcoming customer service area of S&S Meadery. The room is decorated in soft earth tones; the oak walls and support beams, while lacking any kind of paint, are sanded to a smooth, pleasing texture. The same can be said for the long counter that stretches almost the length of the wall opposite the front door, behind which stand four bottle racks spaced evenly. The outer two racks have between them a pair of square windows, with simple diamond cut panes in them. Between the middle racks, positioned in the exact center of the long counter, are a pair of framed pictures. One of the owner, Sky Blue, and the other of Salsa Verde, her Very Special Somepony and the delight of her heart.
[ Obvious Exits: <O>ut to the Market ]
[ Players: Sky_Blue(#398PBC)
Dusty has arrived.
Dusty(#839PBC) [Female Unicorn]
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You see before you a short, young unicorn, with a white coat and grey mane. Her mane and tail are about medium length, and messy. Her coat and mane however, has dust all over it, creating a sort of mottled appearance. She's a sculptor who lives in ponyville. tinyurl.com/75b3xxc
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<OOC> Dusty found the way! :3
Dusty has just looked at you!
<OOC> Sky_Blue hoofs Dusty!
<OOC> Dusty is hoofed!
<OOC> You say, "Who go first?"
<OOC> Dusty rolls die
<OOC> Dusty points to sky.
<OOC> Sky_Blue is OOC for a bit! Making maps
<OOC> Sky_Blue but lovehugs!
<OOC> Dusty says, "okay! Derpy, you then :3"
Derpy is standing behind the the counter, smiling genially and apparently doing nothing except possibly--possibly--thinking. Her wings are folded neatly at her sides and she has a neat little cap on.
Dusty walks in, apparently a little lost. She may be a ponyville resident, but she doesnt get out much, till recently, because her friend Beryl decided to trade her stones for social interaction. So therefore Dusty came here, not knowing exactly what the place was. Noting the pony behind the counter, she smiled. "Hello?" She said, tentatively.
Derpy smiles back, stepping forward with tiny steps. "Helllo!" she says in a disorientingly ill-formed high-pitched voice. "Welcome to Meadry! How can help?!" The gray bartender's wings rise in apparent joy.
Dusty blinks a bit at the strange grey bartender. "I dunno, what is done here? It smells like old cider and... something else..."
Derpy turns up half her smile while the other half gets rather serious. She lowers her wings most of the way. "Is honey," she confised. "Alcohol? Is treasure found in bee sauce."
PUB >> Marbletos, the Filemaker says, "You also told Marble ALL your secrets!"
<OOC> Dusty says, "hi salsa"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Of the helloness."
<OOC> Dusty says, "...wat"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Is thereuponings of the RPness. Of the joinings of the okaynesses?"
<OOC> You say, "Is of, from, beyond, before, below, around, within, and above the okaynesses!!!"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Of the hoorayings!"
## Salsa_Verde changes her status to IC (In Character).
Dusty shrugs, having no experince in the field. She didnt drink to create art, that's what the brownies are for! Wait. Anyways, the sculptor approaches the bar. "Well, I mean, I didnt know that there was a meadery here..."
Derpy looks up at the ceiling and frowns. She looks back to the customer. "Is okay. Me not either!!" She grins and leaps gracelessly over the counter, stumbling on the way. "Want to buy meads??"
Salsa Verde, sauce mare. A very distinct and hard to forget individual. The green mare is exiting the kitchen with a dozen eggs levitated from her horn, her beadyeyes studying the carton. One could perhaps ask her what she is doing. Especially as she carefully sets the cartoon down on the ground and then pounding her face on it to muck the eggs.
Skippy has arrived.
Derpy looks over queerly at Salsa, while the skiuttish customer flees from overenthusiastic Derpy. "Salllsa? Why egg?"
<OOC> Skippy says, "I think somepony likes me. ^_^"
<OOC> You say, "Hello Skippish."
( Salsa peers up from the eggs she smashed, yolk dribbling down from her face. She is careful to keep it dribbling on the carton. "Of the shieldings. The protectiveness of the whichings thereuponness from the villings of Ponynesses..." She peers around suspiciously, then leans in closely to Derpy, albumen seeping. "... from... the... gnomeses." )
Derpy blinks several times at Salsa. Each time, there's a little chime, and her eyes are in a different position when she opens them. She shakes her head to clear it. "Egg? Is shield for bird." She lifts a hoof and touches Salsa's nose gently, getting it eggy. "But gnoooomes?" She derps, and then says clearly: "Not lay eggs!"
Salsa throws a crazy hoof into the air, splatting more egg. "Of the fearings! There is a fearnessnessings of the eggses of the gnomeses." Salsa gets behind the counter and starts rummaging. "Do the stopness. Do the stopness! The stopness!" Rummage, rummafge. "OF THE BRUSHES OF PAINTINGS UPON THE WHERENESSES?!"
<OOC> Skippy says, "Trying to understand what's going on here XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Derpy is, I think, tending bar... Salsa is... Salsa. She's crazy, don't try to understand her. XD She's smashed some eggs and is now searching for a paintbrush."
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "I'm I'm trying to convince Sky to POSE ALREADY. XD"
Skippy steps in through the front door, blinking at the rambling unicorn as he passes by, sitting himself by the bar, glancing over at the grey pegasus. "Drunken stupor?"
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "Ah'm workin', dammit. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Work and pose! I do it all the time!"
<OOC> Skippy says, "I'm working too."
<OOC> Skippy says, "I have a lot to do this week : /"
Derpy glaces over at the newcomer. She tries to smile, but finds it hard with Salsa overacting and egg whites dripping from her face. "No. If drunken, then ~cannot~ guess!" She steps around the bar, letting Salsa take her place. She's about to ask the customer what she can do for him when Salsa starts raving and she turns back, snapping at her: "Stopness of WHAT? FEARNESS OF WHOOOM!!"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "It is hard to figure why the two don't like each other. XD"
<OOC> You say, "Is true."
<OOC> You say, "Maybe Derpy? Half gnome."
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "DERPYMOMMYGNOME?! D:"
<OOC> Skippy says, "We're all ponies here"
<OOC> Derpy only joke.
<OOC> You say, "...maybe."
<OOC> Salsa_Verde beadyeyes.
<OOC> Derpy derpyeyes.
<OOC> Skippy says, "Are you expecting me to pose next?"
<OOC> Derpy not expect. Only hope.
"Stop the gnomeses. There is a mustings of stopness of gnomeses." Salsa is not finding the paintbrush, and this seems to be getting her upset. Soon she slams a drawer shut, then seems to take notice of the newcomer. BEadyeyes. "Og the helloness."
Derpy shoots a sharp glance back to Salsa. "Nevver gnome," she enunciates. Her ears flick. She then turns back to Skippy and places her feet neatly in place. "Can help?"
"Uh, hello? Are you okay? Skippy scratches his head, looking back at Derpy. "Ah, yup. I was lookin' to get a drink, a mug of that cider?" He drops the bits on the bar. "What's a g-gnome?"
( Salsa hears that question and jumps right up on the bar and leans in close to fix Skippy with her eyes, searching him. Piercing his soul with her eyes. "You are not of the gnomeses." She doesn't move. Is he a spy? )
IS he a SPY??! Derpy doesn't care. She leaps in place, her wings flipping out for a second, and then dashes away from Salsa in a panic. Then she speeds into the back and her voice can be heard imploring Sky to fix a cider. She fled the insanity and placed the order in one fluid motion! Is intent? Or purpose?
<OOC> Sky_Blue is so confusedlost. XD
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Salsa is trying to figure out if Skippy, who ordered a drink from Derpy, is a spy for the gnomes."
Skippy frowns and tries tries to push the crazed unicorn off the bar. "You should prolly sleep off whatever your high on."
"Skychiilld! CIIDEERRR! Make it old one." Derpy sounds so funny when she's frazzled.
( "COMIN'!" bellows the voice of a hayseed from further within the meadery, shortly accompanied by a cyan filly with a shock of bright yellow hair bursting out through the double doors to the mead room itself, a bottle of dark cider clutched in her mouth. Trotting over to the counter, she sets it down in front of Skippy with a bright smile, then turns to look at her Very Special- "... why've y'all got eggs on yer face, Salsy?" )
Salsa beadyeyes. Did that pony just try to push her off the bar? And was that an insult? What did this pony say to the crazy sauce mare of Ponyville? Her pupils are constricting rapidly. She hops down, her eyes, fixed dangerously on the customer. "I am of the needings of my whiskness. ... ... ... Of the *mayonn--*" Salsa loses all her focus as her Very Special Somepony arrives. "Of the Skyness!"
Derpy speeds in and whispers into Sky's ear: "Is for gnomelies." She then leeeans over the bar and tugs at Salsa's ear. "Whisk? In draw-er. Other whisk?" She looks behind her. "In pile of junks. Needly for cleeaning!"
"I reckon she must have ate something bad." He continues to stare at the Unicorn, taking a swig of the cider. "Mm, that's pretty good."
Is Skippy.
( "That'll be... ten-eight bits, please!" Sky Blue informs the stallion, before turning her attention back to Salsa, and then to Derpy, looking relatively confused. "Why've y'all got eggs all over yer face, sugarcube?" she repeats, her attention focusing once more upon the crazy saucemare. "They weren't the ones ah was keepin' in the larder, were they?" )
Salsa was about to go get her battle whisk when Sky again stops her to ask why she has egg all over her face. Then she asks where the eggs came from. Her beady eyes look in one direction, then in the other direction, then at Sky Blue. "Of the maybeness."
Derpy focuses in on Salsa. "How ~much~ of maybeness?" She pauses and teeters ominously on straight legs. "~Alllll~ of maybeness?!"
Skippy slides them off the counter for her anyways. "Here ya go." He looks between the unicorn, the pegasus and the filly, taking another swig of cider he looks at the filly. "Hey, ya'll wouldn't happen to need a peanut supplier, would ya?"
Red_Velvet has arrived.
"Ah was savin' those fer some bakin', sweetie!" Sky Blue informs her beloved with a sigh and a mildly frustrated expression, before shaking her head. "It doesn't matter; ah'll pick up some more later." When the customer speaks up, the earth filly turns her attention to him and replies in an apologetic voice, "Ah'm afraid we don't have a need fer 'em, as far as ah know, sugarcube; we don't use 'em in makin' mead."
<OOC> Sky_Blue hugs RV!
<OOC> Red_Velvet says, "What sort of underhooved business goes on within these walls?! "
<OOC> Red_Velvet smirks.
<OOC> You say, "Is cider sale and gnome banish."
<OOC> Red_Velvet says, "Both very important points of trade and safety!"
<OOC> Red_Velvet says, "I do love the decor here as well. "
<OOC> Red_Velvet hugs everypony.
<OOC> Red_Velvet says, "I may join in a round. If that is acceptable?"
<OOC> You say, "Yes surely. But I? Will must go soon."
<OOC> Sky_Blue hugs!
( Salsa beadyeyes. Peanuts. In making peanut butter. A condiment. She makes condiments in her shop. She cleanly leaps over the bar and sits her plot right next to Skippy. "Of the peanutses? For the makings of butternesses of peanutses?" )
Derpy is knocked over and falls stiff on the floor. A few seconds later, she gets up and stands behind the bar, smiling placidly.
Skippy takes another swig and produces a jar of peanut butter, setting it on the counter. "Uh- yup. We make that too. Great stuff. We uppin' our supply this year so if your lookin' fer some wholesale. Uh, we make it. hah!" He finishes off the mug of cider. "Think I can get some more?"
Derpy quietly takest he bottle in her teeth and tilts it sideways, letting the cider flow into the cup. Her ireses fall to the bottom of their sclera, but amazingly she doesn't spill any. She turns and rights herself and plops the bottle down again. Such a good bartender!
Red_Velvet limps into the meadery, glancing around the customer reception area and the purchasing counter. She looks much the worse for wear. Her normally flawless mane is a utter wreck. Her back left leg bandaged with a hint of blood seeping through. Her gait is still and she winces with each step, "Hello Sky darling. I do hope I am not intruding on you and Salsa. I just wanted come come by and check on you both. I was...concerned. How are you doing?"
<OOC> Sky_Blue is getting tired and gets sprung on by Red the Warhero!
<OOC> Red_Velvet hugs, "Oh Darling I wasn't aware you were getting ready for a rest. Don't mind my pose then. "
<OOC> Skippy says, "Woooo! Partaaaay!"
( Salsa beadyeyes as she hears the pony say what he does, echoing unnaturally through her addled brain: 'Uh- yup. We make so if your lookin' if your lookin' fer yup. We make that that too. Great stuff. Hah!' She seems to be listening to this a moment, then leans over to Skippy. "Of the *whatness* of the sayings of the younesses? Of... the... *making* of a sauceness? A SAUCENESS?!" )
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "So... how would y'like yer remains t'be interred, Skippy?"
Derpy shakes Salsa with the gentle feel of someone dislodging a ball from a gutter. "Not is sauce. Is butter!" She grins to Skippy. "Is peeaanut butteeerr." She smiles to Red if she's there, and frowns at seeing her injuries.
<OOC> Salsa_Verde OOCly notes its nothing personal. XD Salsa is... unstable and probably not at all fond of competition.
<OOC> Skippy says, "What is this. Some sort of cupcakes thing going on? "
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "Salsa's clinically insane. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "I won't go as far as CUPCAKES, though. But Salsa's got what has been affectionately dubbed the Battle Whisk. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "You'll be fine, I promise. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde hopes she's not OOCly scaring Skippy. Salsa's actually meant to be funny, not scary. XD
<OOC> You say, "Oh, is funny all right."
Skippy starts drinking more cider as soon as it's poured, flicking an ear, blinking. Looking back at Salsa. "Hnnh? Where ya'll get your peanut? Ours is the best. This one colt waf like, canterlot make better peanut, and I get in his face an like WHAT? Then you know what he do? That pansy go an wet himself! hahahah!" He bangs on the bar and takes another swig. Looks like he's starting to lose it himself.
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Well hey, tit for tat, Skippy scared Marble. "
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Sky doesn't have any vases in her meadery, does she? XD"
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "Of the noness. XD"
<OOC> Sky_Blue says, "She's genre savvy. XD"
Red_Velvet smiles and waves Sky's concern away, then she actually looks worried for a moment, it takes a lot to worry Red. "Sky dear, I was in the hospital earlier. But with the help of two clients and another friend I made an escape. We sort of had to crush...77? or was it 78 ponies to get out? I lost count darling. But I felt I needed to come see you and dear Salsa. I was worried for you both. Nothing untoward has happened today?" Red Velvet glances at Salsa and then back to Sky, "Darling...if I might make a request. Don't...don't go anywhere without Salsa, and don't let her go anywhere without you alright? Just...watch over one another if you please?"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Good. A vase in there Salsa might end out taking out half of Sky's customers. "
"A small explosion or two, but nothin' out of the ordin'ry," the hayseed replies to Red Velvet, blinking heavily a couple of times. "Y'know Salsa could take out a dragon if she wanted to. How come we need t'stick together? Has somethin' happened?" All of this goes on with Sky Blue being oblivious to what is no doubt reaching FaceVase territory, behind her.
Derpy lifts a hoof and tries to speak, but can't get a word in. Eventually, she give Sky Blue a kiss on the cheek. "Must go now," she murmurs. "Time for mail."
<OOC> Skippy says, "I'm very confused. XD"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Word of advice: Trying to make sense of the most insane pony in Equestria will just make your head hurt. XD"
Salsa is panting, clearly distressed, clearly getting energized by these words echoing through her randomized clockwork of a brain. 'Colt waf like, canterlot colt waf like, canterlot that pansy go an that pansy go an best. This one colt and I get in waf like, canterlot make where ya'll get your pansy go an wet in his face an do? That pansy go do? That pansy go he do? That pansy get in his face where ya'll get your best.' Salsa could care less about pansies getting all scared. What she does pick up on, however, is this colt saying stuff like 'making the best peanut butter' as her brain soon paraphrases it. "The mentsnesses of the condiyings of the MENTENESS MINENSSES! Evergnomeses of the lovingses! OF THE LOVINGSES!" The insane sauce mare soon stands up, letting out a bloodcurdling, Amazonian war cry of all time! Three bar stools are levitated in the air. "OF THE GNOMESESNESSINGS LOVINGSES OF THE YOUNESS!"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "FaceVase 2.0: Dodgebarstool"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde hopes Skippy isn't OOCly concerned. XD
<OOC> Salsa_Verde doesn't hurt anypony without permission. XD
<OOC> Salsa_Verde says, "Also, Dodgebarstool sounds like a Dwarf Fortress fortress name. XD"
Skippy squenches his face and stands up. "Hay geez lady, what was that guy your boyfrien' or somethin'? I dinni' mean it like that. He was insultin' my business. Damn, calm down!"
<OOC> Salsa_Verde sometimes worries and fusses OOCly. XD
Red_Velvet is about to answer Sky's questions, but it is then that Salsa seems to reach critical mass. Red turns and makes for the end of the bar for cover should things turn ugly....er, uglier. Stating flatly while she goes, "Yes Sky, something has happened, something terrible. I think you and Salsa may be in danger. Regardless of Salsa's capacity for destruction. A truly vicious pony may be actually targeting you both. I fear Sky she is going to try to hurt you if she can." Red slips behind the counter and covers her head with her hooves, definitely not wanting to see what becomes of Skippy.
When Salsa goes into rage mode and screams, levitating three stools, Derpy's hair stands up more spikily than usual and in a panic she skitters out of the building, knocking over a chair as she goes.